seasons of love
oh well.. i'm actually typing in the airplane now... have so much to write about.m. and sometimes i really miss my blog so much...somehow, i think that besides this blog, i don't have any other real place i can throw all my thoughts and frustrations, my feelings into.. some people havetheir mums, but well... mine can't keep secrets.. some people have their brothers and sisters, but well.. we all understandeach other pretty well, we don't really bother to ask. and well i'm kinda away / out of touch with all my friends back home at this moment in time. sometimes i do journal. but.. like its so much faster to type, and well.. u don't like to get interrupted halfway while u're pouring urself out.
so well.. i look out of the airplane.. and i see a streak of cumulonimbus clouds.. and above it a slight bit of cirrus clouds. wow... things look so wonderful from up here, except for the plane shaking, and e engine drowning out almost every other noise...
we've left my dad and sister back in NY... they're going back to Singapore, while we continue on into Texas, and then to San Diego.so well... once again.. yes. everyone's grumbling in some way or the other... i just keep quiet. and still i get scolded.. but today, the point is not about me...its just how perhaps i wish i was away. alone perhaps. but away from my family.. or at least my parents.. and i don't say this very often.sigh. everyone's unreasonable. and like i always get linked into it, even though i really dun add any fuel to the fire...
flashback : my brother got scolded on his graduation day, my sister got scolded for grumbling too much while we were looking for a particular chinese restaurant.today my mum got scolded for like wanting to go another place to eat besides the "food emporium" which sells a huge variety of foods, but foods not exactly palatable.yes well... yup everyone gets scolded.. except my dad. pity. well i dont' really get scolded. the only thing i got on this entire trip was perhaps.. 1. the computer thing which blowed over without getting too big. 2. oh for forgetting to return my room key card to him before he asked for it. besides thatkeeping quiet has really kept me out of all the major "hairdryer treatments, walk-outs, scoldings, etc. etc. etc" my sister and mum seems to invite the most trouble..my brother gets it too.. but oh well....one day... when i leave all this.. perhaps i'll be much happier, like i already am now.and i just sigh.. and sigh... and wish things were different...i guess, sometimes 21 years is enough... yup and i always wished that how things were perfect? me and my sis really believe... that people make wrong choices.. and if u made the wrong choice (if u feel that way)1. its probably not the wrong choice, it was probably meant to be, but even if u feel that way...u should accept the consequences, and live with it.... and make the best out of it.i guess, for us, it wasn't exactly our choice.. but whatever the case.. well.. there's not much we can do. yeah.. unless u move out, i guess u're away from everything.but really.. coming on this trip has been nothing short of terrible...i've hardly had many happy moments out hereand i miss home even more now..
i wish that i didnt' need to be around all this...and i sometimes would like to vow, how i wouldn't ever go on a trip with them again....whats the pt? like... its better back in singapore where everyone is busy and everyone sees everyone less.at least we can all go on with our own lives... and we can take more upon the nice-ties that we all show sometimes but here.. well.. ur lives intertwine so much.. and everything is done together.. and there's no escaping from that.right now i'm happy i'm alone, or at least with my brother .. yup =) we grew up together, cried for each other.protected each other... fought for each other. at least there's more to cherish and to hold on to there.family.... i need a family
=things don't always go your way, because its all part of God's perfect plan. live life with love.. 525600 minutes of the different seasons of weather. its 525600 minutes of the seasons of love as well=
yes, i jsut watched rent at broadway.
here's what happened this morning : well.. my sister went on her own to shop. so my mum, bro and me who were supposed to fly off earlier todayto catch a flight to Shreveport (dun ask me where that is, i don't know), accompanied my dad for a brunch outingat first we were supposed to go this noodle house ( my dad wants to eat chinese food, ya. ) so we went there, this place calledOllie's noodle house and grill. well.. yes so anyway it was closed, opened later at 1130. it was 1030 then. so we were suppoed to leave at 12so anyway, ya.. we had to find another place to eat. so my dad wanted to bring us to "food emporium" (i have no idea why, cos he wanted to see the place i guesS)yeah... but it was like 6 blocks down. so my mum and my brother kept suggesting that we just eat somewhere nearer...he refused and walked off.. yup so we just followed. on reaching food emporium. he wanted us to buy the chicken to eat. my mum didn't want to, neither did my brotherthey wanted to eat pancakes.. i was just looking around. my dad asked me if i wanted sushi so i just grabbed sushi, since i felt like eating either that, a sandwich or fruitsyeah... well.. anyway the food wasn't very nice, a cafe would have been nicer, and probably cheaper. but my dad just wanted us to eat thereso my mum suggested somewhere else. yup my dad scolded her and my brother, and walked off in a huff, saying.. "you all so fussy, just eat what u want, i going back to the hotel first"i think he expected us to go after him. yup. cos he came back looking for us anyway. by then, i was eating my sushi, and my mum and bro were eating pancakes and french toast respectively.yup. so well.. everyone got scolded... except me.. well thats partly cos i din't say a word at all the entire morning to them,..i just walked. thinking about it all...and perhaps looking forward to now... and that has rubbed off on me quite a bit as i grew up... i guess, i wasn't born an introvert, neither was i born so reserved... or quieti guess people do change to how they live their life, or the environment they were brought up in.. though it'll be their own choice ultimately. sigh yeah so anyway there was a whole load of arguments after that (not including me - besides the room key thing) and u know... i guess when i couldn't write, or do things to take my mind off all thisu know what i did? i went walking around, shopping.. haha. ya but well.. i didn't spend a loti got my shopping list though! so all of u, yup i think i got what u wanted. and more.
sometimes i wish i didn't have to write it all down here, but sometimes it just seems i need to.
"New York, Washington, Niagara. whats the point of it all, whats the pt of this whole holiday"
so well.. i look out of the airplane.. and i see a streak of cumulonimbus clouds.. and above it a slight bit of cirrus clouds. wow... things look so wonderful from up here, except for the plane shaking, and e engine drowning out almost every other noise...
we've left my dad and sister back in NY... they're going back to Singapore, while we continue on into Texas, and then to San Diego.so well... once again.. yes. everyone's grumbling in some way or the other... i just keep quiet. and still i get scolded.. but today, the point is not about me...its just how perhaps i wish i was away. alone perhaps. but away from my family.. or at least my parents.. and i don't say this very often.sigh. everyone's unreasonable. and like i always get linked into it, even though i really dun add any fuel to the fire...
flashback : my brother got scolded on his graduation day, my sister got scolded for grumbling too much while we were looking for a particular chinese restaurant.today my mum got scolded for like wanting to go another place to eat besides the "food emporium" which sells a huge variety of foods, but foods not exactly palatable.yes well... yup everyone gets scolded.. except my dad. pity. well i dont' really get scolded. the only thing i got on this entire trip was perhaps.. 1. the computer thing which blowed over without getting too big. 2. oh for forgetting to return my room key card to him before he asked for it. besides thatkeeping quiet has really kept me out of all the major "hairdryer treatments, walk-outs, scoldings, etc. etc. etc" my sister and mum seems to invite the most trouble..my brother gets it too.. but oh well....one day... when i leave all this.. perhaps i'll be much happier, like i already am now.and i just sigh.. and sigh... and wish things were different...i guess, sometimes 21 years is enough... yup and i always wished that how things were perfect? me and my sis really believe... that people make wrong choices.. and if u made the wrong choice (if u feel that way)1. its probably not the wrong choice, it was probably meant to be, but even if u feel that way...u should accept the consequences, and live with it.... and make the best out of it.i guess, for us, it wasn't exactly our choice.. but whatever the case.. well.. there's not much we can do. yeah.. unless u move out, i guess u're away from everything.but really.. coming on this trip has been nothing short of terrible...i've hardly had many happy moments out hereand i miss home even more now..
i wish that i didnt' need to be around all this...and i sometimes would like to vow, how i wouldn't ever go on a trip with them again....whats the pt? like... its better back in singapore where everyone is busy and everyone sees everyone less.at least we can all go on with our own lives... and we can take more upon the nice-ties that we all show sometimes but here.. well.. ur lives intertwine so much.. and everything is done together.. and there's no escaping from that.right now i'm happy i'm alone, or at least with my brother .. yup =) we grew up together, cried for each other.protected each other... fought for each other. at least there's more to cherish and to hold on to there.family.... i need a family
=things don't always go your way, because its all part of God's perfect plan. live life with love.. 525600 minutes of the different seasons of weather. its 525600 minutes of the seasons of love as well=
yes, i jsut watched rent at broadway.
here's what happened this morning : well.. my sister went on her own to shop. so my mum, bro and me who were supposed to fly off earlier todayto catch a flight to Shreveport (dun ask me where that is, i don't know), accompanied my dad for a brunch outingat first we were supposed to go this noodle house ( my dad wants to eat chinese food, ya. ) so we went there, this place calledOllie's noodle house and grill. well.. yes so anyway it was closed, opened later at 1130. it was 1030 then. so we were suppoed to leave at 12so anyway, ya.. we had to find another place to eat. so my dad wanted to bring us to "food emporium" (i have no idea why, cos he wanted to see the place i guesS)yeah... but it was like 6 blocks down. so my mum and my brother kept suggesting that we just eat somewhere nearer...he refused and walked off.. yup so we just followed. on reaching food emporium. he wanted us to buy the chicken to eat. my mum didn't want to, neither did my brotherthey wanted to eat pancakes.. i was just looking around. my dad asked me if i wanted sushi so i just grabbed sushi, since i felt like eating either that, a sandwich or fruitsyeah... well.. anyway the food wasn't very nice, a cafe would have been nicer, and probably cheaper. but my dad just wanted us to eat thereso my mum suggested somewhere else. yup my dad scolded her and my brother, and walked off in a huff, saying.. "you all so fussy, just eat what u want, i going back to the hotel first"i think he expected us to go after him. yup. cos he came back looking for us anyway. by then, i was eating my sushi, and my mum and bro were eating pancakes and french toast respectively.yup. so well.. everyone got scolded... except me.. well thats partly cos i din't say a word at all the entire morning to them,..i just walked. thinking about it all...and perhaps looking forward to now... and that has rubbed off on me quite a bit as i grew up... i guess, i wasn't born an introvert, neither was i born so reserved... or quieti guess people do change to how they live their life, or the environment they were brought up in.. though it'll be their own choice ultimately. sigh yeah so anyway there was a whole load of arguments after that (not including me - besides the room key thing) and u know... i guess when i couldn't write, or do things to take my mind off all thisu know what i did? i went walking around, shopping.. haha. ya but well.. i didn't spend a loti got my shopping list though! so all of u, yup i think i got what u wanted. and more.
sometimes i wish i didn't have to write it all down here, but sometimes it just seems i need to.
"New York, Washington, Niagara. whats the point of it all, whats the pt of this whole holiday"
posted by Matthias | 7:32 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home