an eventful week. but like who cares.
hmm become really really pessimistic again, its one of those times in my life....
like... 1. in army camp. they split my nsf bunch up, basically they splitting the people that i've spent more than a year with... and the reasons behind it are quite uncalled for. relly quite affected by it, our future seems uncertain and like they're breaking e bond we all share together as nsfs.guess thats what happened in e week, like not tt many people know how i feel about it. i'm really sad, i just really don't show it at all... like the soft side to me is too vulnerable, and i've been disappointed, distressed so many times before..... it hink i'm giving my friends the wrong impression though, but it always is like that, i'm never able to strike e perfect balance.
2. my mum thinks i'm gonna be led astray by my non-christian army friends! 1stly i have tonnes of respect for them, and like they're way better than a lot of friends or poeple in church anyway. so led astray by what! ... i don't see it. they drink less, they go clubbing less, they are not stuck up, they care for people, etc... like ya at least they're my friends, at least they are good people. nice people. my friends people. well... okay anyway i think i'm gonna be the person tt strays e least anyway. i like have a gd sense of my principles, values and all, and i know what i am and what i believe in, and thats God and christianity. so like... if she's concerned, i think she has a lot more other people out there besides me to worry about. tt i can promise her.
well i can't stand a lot of people now but i have no heart to really tell them that, i think i've been keeping up a lot of things inside me with no outlet.. and well i've had quite a number of outbursts lately. i really think mebbe i should just be more straightforth, even if it hurts me. and it might affect my life greatly. like this person is too wadever, that person is too self centered, this person is too superficial, that person is too nonsensical, this person is too ego, that person is too judgemental, this person is too shallow, that person is too aloof and stuck up, etc etc etc... but i shouldn't be too judgemental but all these little thougts and conflicts slowly build up. can't be very gd to me.
right now still wondering who really reads my blog.. like well... really don't know..
haha anyway i'ms o sad... like my friends were all talking about their girl-friends/ex-girl friends in camp... and like for me i just need that one single girl in my life. just waiting for her to come. slowly slowly waiting,think God really protects u and tries to help u get the right one. oh well i can dream can't i. know some pretty great girls...but well just dreaming for that special one! i sound like a love sick fooolllll DAMN! but like haha.. okay la, its natural too. but y not either right. like a lot of people i know go through all this too. after all its what u seeking in ur life, i'm looking forward to my family. e future.
hmm well i'm letting a lot of things go lately. like... if u really want me to think less, this is it, i tend to think a lot when like i like someone.. then u always think like how things going and all that, and like is this happening for some reason or another. yeah. i'm not juding, i'm not affected by people, well its just like how God knows and is aware that humans sin and make tonnes of mistakes, i'm like that now, like ya... aware and willing to let like nature be nature. i am me and like thats who i am, and thats what people are like too.
well... and well e best people are not christians, in fact, they hardly ever are. only God is almighty, all great, all perfect. so like i think to my mum i would say " i think God knows best who i should spend my time with, who will lead me to e right path and on e right path, so i should just trust in him and know that whether my friends or christian or non-christian like... i'll be there. "
well...
"as we go on, we remember, all the times we, had together, and as our lives change, come what ever, we will still be, friends forever. "
well anyway there's this person i'm trying very hard to get to know cos that person is very very very very nice, i feel and really down to earth and what i really look for in people.! hope tt one works out well! gd night guys. like....god's plan is fate.ts true.
like... 1. in army camp. they split my nsf bunch up, basically they splitting the people that i've spent more than a year with... and the reasons behind it are quite uncalled for. relly quite affected by it, our future seems uncertain and like they're breaking e bond we all share together as nsfs.guess thats what happened in e week, like not tt many people know how i feel about it. i'm really sad, i just really don't show it at all... like the soft side to me is too vulnerable, and i've been disappointed, distressed so many times before..... it hink i'm giving my friends the wrong impression though, but it always is like that, i'm never able to strike e perfect balance.
2. my mum thinks i'm gonna be led astray by my non-christian army friends! 1stly i have tonnes of respect for them, and like they're way better than a lot of friends or poeple in church anyway. so led astray by what! ... i don't see it. they drink less, they go clubbing less, they are not stuck up, they care for people, etc... like ya at least they're my friends, at least they are good people. nice people. my friends people. well... okay anyway i think i'm gonna be the person tt strays e least anyway. i like have a gd sense of my principles, values and all, and i know what i am and what i believe in, and thats God and christianity. so like... if she's concerned, i think she has a lot more other people out there besides me to worry about. tt i can promise her.
well i can't stand a lot of people now but i have no heart to really tell them that, i think i've been keeping up a lot of things inside me with no outlet.. and well i've had quite a number of outbursts lately. i really think mebbe i should just be more straightforth, even if it hurts me. and it might affect my life greatly. like this person is too wadever, that person is too self centered, this person is too superficial, that person is too nonsensical, this person is too ego, that person is too judgemental, this person is too shallow, that person is too aloof and stuck up, etc etc etc... but i shouldn't be too judgemental but all these little thougts and conflicts slowly build up. can't be very gd to me.
right now still wondering who really reads my blog.. like well... really don't know..
haha anyway i'ms o sad... like my friends were all talking about their girl-friends/ex-girl friends in camp... and like for me i just need that one single girl in my life. just waiting for her to come. slowly slowly waiting,think God really protects u and tries to help u get the right one. oh well i can dream can't i. know some pretty great girls...but well just dreaming for that special one! i sound like a love sick fooolllll DAMN! but like haha.. okay la, its natural too. but y not either right. like a lot of people i know go through all this too. after all its what u seeking in ur life, i'm looking forward to my family. e future.
hmm well i'm letting a lot of things go lately. like... if u really want me to think less, this is it, i tend to think a lot when like i like someone.. then u always think like how things going and all that, and like is this happening for some reason or another. yeah. i'm not juding, i'm not affected by people, well its just like how God knows and is aware that humans sin and make tonnes of mistakes, i'm like that now, like ya... aware and willing to let like nature be nature. i am me and like thats who i am, and thats what people are like too.
well... and well e best people are not christians, in fact, they hardly ever are. only God is almighty, all great, all perfect. so like i think to my mum i would say " i think God knows best who i should spend my time with, who will lead me to e right path and on e right path, so i should just trust in him and know that whether my friends or christian or non-christian like... i'll be there. "
well...
"as we go on, we remember, all the times we, had together, and as our lives change, come what ever, we will still be, friends forever. "
well anyway there's this person i'm trying very hard to get to know cos that person is very very very very nice, i feel and really down to earth and what i really look for in people.! hope tt one works out well! gd night guys. like....god's plan is fate.ts true.
posted by Matthias | 9:14 AM
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