connections!
today, it was a gd thing having duty with this army mate of mine.
think he misunderstands me, but after talking to me alone during breaks and lunch cos thatws how our system works, he kinda sees more in me...
haha really pleased at that, think he understands me more now, and he realises why i am the way i am... and not bcos of other reasons...
was really happy at the way he encouraged and was helping me throughout the day in army as i was doing work, really. think he'll make a good friend, but i don't know him well enough yet. helps that he's christian so he shares something in common with me.
hmmm besides that, really realise that i really like having a little younger sister around that i can help with her studies, life and all that... its like how i teach my jss kids and in a way they all see me as their kor kor, someone that can help them with their maths and science and teach them.... someone they can talk to about their problems, they can tell about their latest happenings in life, and play with. i enjoy being that... thats why its quite a joy teaching jss.
well, not much happening in life right now, spending a lot of time alone, yet in a way i'm much more stable and happier than when i'm with people.
no more mood swings, feeling sad/angry/happy all the time over little things.... duno which is better of me, in a way, i felt i do more for people when i'm in e other state.... when i'm like this, i'm just detached from e world, really self-reflecting, getting on with life, working hard.
besides i am a workaholic... i just try to do everything myself, i ultimately manage to but at the expense of myself which oh well.. isn't very healthy for me.
anyway the bali bombings tt happened this week? really pray for it, the world is getting more violent, with huang na's murder, the maid's murders, bali bombings, sept 11, tsunami, hurricanes, etc. etc.. its getting overboard.. wonder whats happening to the world. just this morning i woke up and saw the ACS tarpaulin that covered the seats at the track all blown out of shape, the metal was bent... and u wonder what happened. for the 1st time, i was thinking to myself... "i'm left behind, i'm still here"..... could this be ....? could it be coming?
i just pray pray pray pray pray, cos i need to pray pray pray pray pray.. tts all that matters.....
prayer. works wonders.
think he misunderstands me, but after talking to me alone during breaks and lunch cos thatws how our system works, he kinda sees more in me...
haha really pleased at that, think he understands me more now, and he realises why i am the way i am... and not bcos of other reasons...
was really happy at the way he encouraged and was helping me throughout the day in army as i was doing work, really. think he'll make a good friend, but i don't know him well enough yet. helps that he's christian so he shares something in common with me.
hmmm besides that, really realise that i really like having a little younger sister around that i can help with her studies, life and all that... its like how i teach my jss kids and in a way they all see me as their kor kor, someone that can help them with their maths and science and teach them.... someone they can talk to about their problems, they can tell about their latest happenings in life, and play with. i enjoy being that... thats why its quite a joy teaching jss.
well, not much happening in life right now, spending a lot of time alone, yet in a way i'm much more stable and happier than when i'm with people.
no more mood swings, feeling sad/angry/happy all the time over little things.... duno which is better of me, in a way, i felt i do more for people when i'm in e other state.... when i'm like this, i'm just detached from e world, really self-reflecting, getting on with life, working hard.
besides i am a workaholic... i just try to do everything myself, i ultimately manage to but at the expense of myself which oh well.. isn't very healthy for me.
anyway the bali bombings tt happened this week? really pray for it, the world is getting more violent, with huang na's murder, the maid's murders, bali bombings, sept 11, tsunami, hurricanes, etc. etc.. its getting overboard.. wonder whats happening to the world. just this morning i woke up and saw the ACS tarpaulin that covered the seats at the track all blown out of shape, the metal was bent... and u wonder what happened. for the 1st time, i was thinking to myself... "i'm left behind, i'm still here"..... could this be ....? could it be coming?
i just pray pray pray pray pray, cos i need to pray pray pray pray pray.. tts all that matters.....
prayer. works wonders.
posted by Matthias | 8:39 AM
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