u know... when u have too many problems

when u have too many problems, things might seem unreal and overexaggerated...

yesterday, my friend mentioned to me how he joined a new cell, and everyone inside was sharing such intimate and personal issues and problems with the rest of the cell... to him... it was a sign of spirituality... but from his point of view. he sees how friendships and all should have a natural progression, and being in that cell... seeing that cell.... and how it worked.. it seemed to have lost that natural progression, instead adopting e mindset of "brothers and sisters in christ"

it was also no surprise to him that they had so many issues...
God vs The World comes up again.
Living a life that pleases God causes u to shun the world, and live away from the world....
yet the world... a place we're living in...
its contradictory. how can we shun it...? unless we have no relationship with it ever?
but we do. and thus our problems and struggles..

yet if u show it too much, it seems unreal... it seems that how much u're bogged down by all the problems does not seem to make much sense to the rest of the people. though u struggle with it, and even if u fully understand how to struggle with it and why u struggle with it... it is stil a problem... and people will never understand why...
if u don't struggle, it just shows u're too comfortable with sin.
wherein lies the balance then? for leaders who shield these thoughts and experiences away from everyone else, afraid to lose that "know all" stance, that "i can deal with everything" mindset, or that "let me guide u through" persona they show to everyone else... they too surely must have their own problems, their struggles... yet they don't show it? why? cos its too much an issue about pride? the call for "spiritual transparency" is there! perhaps they don't have these issues cos they know how to deal with it all within themselves. so is it an ego thing? cos man will never fully understand god... and so many other things, can they truly count on their own understanding when dealing with all these problems. the methods of guidance definitely encompasses other spiritual counsel. or maybe they feel that its just between God and them, then u question whats the purpose of the cell group. and of course, the church.

so qn 1. from my perspective. how does a leader firstly lead a life that is so true and spiritual transparent, facing all the problems, issues and whatsoever, without compromising that respect, at the same time guiding and building up people, knowing well that they're going to look at him/her and see all the problems he/she is facing and think to themselves... how this person can help them along with all their problems.
cos while the call to be humble, and to think others better than urself... how many actually do it... ? how many actually feel that everyone else out there will be able to understand ur struggles, understand you, help u along as though u're the child in need of guidance. how many actually think they can rely on themselves?
and though it is definitely not for me to judge. everyone should look at themselves... are you really relying on yourself or on God? then again the latest YAG write up talks about wisdom.. IRonic! wisdom comes from you, and it shows u're relying on yourself. just like common sense..
then u think and everything is becoming more contradictory.
its always us thinking. even if we pray and all... God is just like a thought, an idea.
theological statements.

then u must remember that God is a pre-supposition and u have to think of him to exist before u think of anything else. Its all about the experience u have with him.
then u realise how perfectly understandable it is for those who do not believe to claim it is because they have not experienced that. then the realisation just keeps going on and on and on.
e.g. u can say that they haven't given God the opportunity to show them tt experience, yet u say god is almighty and omnipotent and doens't need to be given that opportunity, then u can say but only if u believe then can u submit that experience to god. of course another one can say that i don't believe because i have not had that experience. and someone else can say it is a personal choice, then another can say so why is it so many have made that personal choice to forsake him and only change after that experience?
Chicken vs Egg Theological Argument.

anyway. okay back to my first point.
how do you strike that balance? what balance is correct? is there a mark to point that out? is that mark Jesus? yet look around..... most leaders do not follow the model of Jesus. wait. most people don't. thats why u see comments of how christians meet some buddhist and see such nice people in them! (oh ya christian context of course) yes we know we're all imperfect and flawed.
so...... what an excuse! for everything. thus stemming the hypocritical stand of the rest of the world.
so what do we do from here? encourage the spiritual member, that shares and pours his/her heart out... indulging in all her/his struggles and sharing it with everyone else, so that everyone is going to be overwhelmed with all the struggles around? yet seem so jaded and all, unable to cope. or support those that sit quietly and understand and understand and feel how and think how u're so close to God and so full of understanding and know that you are... seeming so invunerable to the works of the devil and all... seeming so mature, so wise and know-it-all? my flaw here. judging others (in my own little biased way). every argument is biased anyway.
everything goes in circleS !

that is why. one should not concern himself/herself with things like this
Christian faith is much simpler than all of this.
believe or don't believe
and if u do... live ur own life to the best of its potential. which is limitless.
the others? tt comes written in ur own life, and in the faith.

"each person lives his/her own life, you can only be true to yourself."

one ultimate judge, one ultimate God.